Forgiving Sam
by mandancie
Summary: Castiel told Sam what he did while he was soulless. Sam wants to apologize or run away or both for he knows that he can't be forgiven. Tag: Season 6 episode 12. This story is sorta a prequel to my story, "I'm sorry, Dean."


**Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural.**

 **A special thanks to AlElizabeth for beta'ing my story.**

 **A/N: I know it has been a very long time since I've written anything Supernatural, but I was reading one of my older Supernatural stories and watching an old episode and this one-shot popped in my head.**

 **Tag: Season 6 Episode 12: Like A Virgin**

 **Summary: Castiel told Sam what he did while he was soulless. Sam wants to apologize or run away or both for he knows that he can't be forgiven.**

 **Forgiving Sam**

It has been an exhausting day, week, month. After this case, Dean still couldn't help the small smile that was on his lips. His baby brother was back. He worked with that other one for six months and couldn't help the disconnection that was between them. They didn't mesh like they usually did. Now, hearing Sammy ask if he stole a diary just made his heart soar. This was his Sammy. This was his bleeding-heart baby brother. And he would not change it for the world.

Dean was so caught up in his thoughts and his elation that his baby brother was back that he didn't see the turmoil that his brother was emitting. The entire drive home Sam had been quiet. Not that Dean was talking either, but Sam didn't even start a conversation.

They were heading back to Sioux Falls. After learning from Castiel what he had done during the last six months, Sam had been wary of going back to Bobby's place. How could he even think that he was welcomed? Cas said that he had almost killed Bobby, and if Dean hadn't shown up in time, he would be dead right now. Taking a quick glance over at his brother, Sam was surprised that Dean would even want to be around him. Sam was glad that he was back. And he's delighted that his brother and Bobby are all right. But he knew one thing was for sure; he couldn't stay.

The Impala was slowing down, pulling up into the driveway of the salvage yard, brought Sam out of his musings. He was a little surprised that they were back so soon.

Later that night, after finding out what it was that they had found in the sewers, Sam sat on the end of his bed. Looking over at his brother, who was asleep, Sam quietly grabbed his things and walked out of the room.

Sam knew that the stairs creaked and they seem to be louder when one is trying to sneak out of the house. But one thing that Sam knew, he learned it from when they were little, if you go down the stairs quickly, they don't creak as much. They are almost silent. Quietly as he could, Sam made it to the first floor. Hoping that he could now make it out and as far as he could away from this place without either one waking, Sam headed towards the back door.

"Sam."

Sam froze. Shaking his head, he did not want to turn towards the voice. He wanted a clean getaway.

"Where you going, Sam?"

"I can't stay here," Sam said, still facing the door. He didn't want to see the anger and hatred that he knew was on his face.

"Turn around, Sam," ordered Bobby. He was leaning against the doorway into the kitchen, having a clear view of the back door.

Bobby heard the door close upstairs in the boys' room. In the years that they stayed with him, Bobby has come to learn which one was coming down the stairs. When he heard the quiet creaks of his stairs, he knew out of recognition that someone was trying to sneak out of his house. Nobody knew this home more than Bobby. It was his after all. So when he saw the silhouette of the youngest Winchester heading towards the back door, Bobby quickly got up from behind the desk and walked to the entrance of the kitchen.

After he called the boy's name and saw Sam tense up, he knew this was going to have to be dealt with. Before the boys went up to their room, Dean pulled Bobby to the side and told him that Cas spilled the beans. Giving Dean his "I told you so" look, Bobby knew that he would have to talk to Sam and get this straightened out.

"I can't stay here," Sam said again. His voice was straining to come out. Bobby knew he was trying to hold it together.

"We need to talk," Bobby said. "Turn around."

Sam lowered his head, defeated. He turned and faced the man he grew up knowing as an uncle and then being the heartless monster he was tried to kill almost two weeks ago.

Bobby looked at the youngest Winchester. His heart just broke at the man standing in front of him. Sam seemed completely heartbroken. Was he hurt that Sam tried to kill him? Yes. But he also knew that it wasn't this Sam standing in front of him now, that Sam was gone. This Sam was the one that grew up in this house.

"Come here, Sam," Bobby said, quietly.

Sam's head popped up from its position. His eyes had fear in them. As much as he wanted to make right what he had done, the last thing he wanted was for it to happen. Coward. Nothing but a useless coward, Sam thought. Take your punishment like a man.

When Bobby looked at the man standing before him, and he saw his face, it felt like a punch to his chest. He could see the fear in the boy's eyes. Never. Never did he ever want to see that in his boy's, yes, his boy's eyes. At that moment Bobby knew. In that precise moment, he knew that Sam was feeling just as horrible about what happened. Looking at Sam, Bobby remembered what Dean said in the garage; It wasn't Sam. Now looking at the boy, he understood. No, it wasn't Sam.

"Come here, Sam," Bobby said, again.

Slowly Sam made his way over to the man that he saw as a father figure to him. The man that he could call whenever there was a problem. Looking at the man, he knew that whatever Bobby did to him, he richly deserved.

Now standing in front of his pseudo uncle, Sam braced himself for what would happen next. Bobby reached up and grabbed the younger man's jacket. Sam instinctively closed his eyes, as he didn't want to see the hatred in the other man's. Expecting to feel pain, Sam was surprised, no utterly shocked when he felt himself being pulled into an embrace. Feeling arms being wrapped around him, Sam melted into the hold.

"I'm sorry, Bobby," Sam muffled out. His head was now leaning on Bobby's shoulder.

Bobby didn't answer. He just shook his head and held him. After a moment, Bobby released Sam and pushed him back to arm's length.

"Go to bed," Bobby ordered. "You're exhausted."

Sam looked like he was going to say something. But Bobby cut him off.

"Not another word," Bobby said. "I will see you in the morning," pushing Sam in the direction of the stairs. "And I don't expect you to be back down here until then. Go to bed."

Sam slowly walked back upstairs, wiping the stray tears that fell when Bobby hugged him. His mind reeling off of what just happened that he didn't notice that Dean was awake when he walked into the room.

"Going somewhere?" Dean asked when Sam closed the door.

Sam looked over at his brother.

"No," Sam said, shaking his head.

"Good," Dean said. "Go to bed. And this time, go to sleep." Dean lay back down and turned his back to his brother.

Sam put his bag down and took his jacket off. Looking over at his brother one more time, he laid down on the opposite bed.

"Good night, Dean."

"'Night, Sam," came a sleepy response.

The smooth sounds of breathing told Sam that Dean had fallen back asleep. Looking over at Dean, Sam whispered, "I'm sorry, Dean." Sam rolled on his side facing the wall and fell asleep within minutes.

Dean turned around in his bed and looked at his brother. He was worried when he woke up, and Sam's bed was empty and was about to rush down the stair going to look for his baby brother when he heard Bobby talking to him, so he decided to wait. When he heard Sam coming back up the stairs, Dean pretended to have been asleep. Now, looking over at his baby brother, he heard what Sammy said before going finally going to sleep. Dean got up and draped a thin blanket over his brother.

"Nothing for you to be sorry about, baby brother," Dean said before getting back into bed.

 **The End**

 **A/N: Thank you for taking the time to read my little one-shot. Please leave a review, letting me know what you think of it. :)**

 **Many hugs and kisses to you all.**

 **Mandancie :)**


End file.
